Thursday, December 07, 2006

Chet Baker, Sweater Model


Just as nature can be an implacable force of destruction, so can it be a comfort. I was thinking about this yesterday as I tramped through the woods with Chet. Our woods is hardly threatening. And yet, I could probably get myself into deep trouble by slipping down a rocky slope, or, as almost happened to Shila and me last year, getting crunked by a giant falling icicle. I'm not getting any younger, and as I scramble up and down the slopes, sometimes on hands and knees, I wonder if I'm crazy to be doing this all alone. I don't know if Chet would be able to jump in the open kitchen window, Lassie-style, and fetch me the crescent wrench to open the bear trap on my foot. He'd probably bring back a cheddar benneh, or a rubber stegosaur. One thing I'd have going for me: If I'm not in the house, and my car's in the garage, Bill knows where to look. The woods.

The woods is my resort, when everything in the civilized world gets oppressive. I go when I just need to get my blood circulating and my bones moving, and when my brain has congealed and doesn't work well anymore. Chet Baker sleeps all day, swaddled in blankets and pillows, unless we walk, and that's reason enough to get out.

Since our neighbor Gary passed away, there's been a mini-renaissance of squirrels on our land. Gary ate them all, but that's the stuff of another story (I'm working on that). The squirrels retain an essential wildness that is something to see, for someone who's been raised in the suburbs, where squirrels sit around the bird feeder like furry Schmoo's, stuffing themselves with high-quality food. Squirrels here in Appalachia git goin' when they see a human. I mean, full fuzz power on the tail, scrambling, falling all over themselves, racing across the forest floor, leaping from tiny twig to tiny twig to put as much real estate between themselves and the predator as possible. It's refreshing. And it means you can feed birds without feeding squirrels.

It's turned really cold, and I put a sweater on Chet for our walk. One thing Wal-mart's good for is cheap dog sweaters, acrylic things that sell for under $6, that help keep your Boston warm while he tears through brambles. The same item might sell for over $25 at the average chain pet store (bastion of outrageous overpricing). If he rips it, well, you just get out the yellow argyle, or the blue chainstitch. The hand-knit red one from Sue Robbins, with his name on it, is strictly a Sunday go-to-meeting sweater. Although I've been known to dress Chet Baker for fashion, let me say he really does need a sweater when the temperature drops below freezing. His close, silky coat has a negative R-value, and he shivers uncontrollably. This winter, he's started making a certain noise when he's cold, a gutteral ennnhhhhhhhhh that seems to issue from his very core. Poor little guy. He's not a girlydog; he's just ill-equipped for cold. He gratefully stands to have his sweater applied, lifting each front paw to put them through the armholes, then frisks around happily once it's on. I particularly like the way this one fits over his turd-tail.

Being wild, our squirrels provide a huge amount of amusement for Chet. He is a dog who looks up, and he's taken to checking the treetops for squirrels. He can cover tremendous ground when he spots one. His eyesight is excellent. Those googly orbs are good for something!

And so he lit out after a frantic squirrel that was so afraid I'd shoot him that he shot up to the top of the tallest oak, realized he couldn't leap to another tree from there, scrabbled back down, dashed across the ground to the next tree, and repeated the exercise until both he and Chet were way over the hill. I skibbled along trying to keep up, and found Chet half out of his cheap sweater, thanks to a clump of catbrier. No girlydog he.
I freed him of the encumbrance so he could be a natural dog.

We left the squirrel in peace and turned toward home.

Still coming out of my funk over James Kim. I fell in love with that family, identifying with them completely, and I guess I hoped so hard that it left a hole in my heart when things went south. I watched a video tribute to him today, and it only confirmed and intensified my feelings. Watch at your own risk. He was full of spirit, life, and love. Your thoughts are a balm. Thank you.

19 Comments:

At 9:14 PM, Blogger Trixie said...

What a fashion plate, that Chet. Add supermodel to his resume.

Thanks for getting me outside in SE Ohio. We have a squirrel that lives in the twisted hemlock near the driveway. We call him Mad Squirrel, he chides us ALL the time whenever we are out. And heaven forbid the girls actually USE the swings. We never see Mad Squirrel, but we hear him.

 
At 9:16 PM, Blogger Trixie said...

And pardon my ignorance, but are there really bear traps around you? For blackies? How many do you suppose live around you? Do you ever see them? What do they eat? Loads of questions....sorry!

 
At 9:33 PM, Blogger NatureWoman said...

What a neat sweater for Chet - I love the way it fits over his little hiney. The sweater half off shot is priceless.

 
At 9:34 PM, Anonymous Lizabird said...

It is not a bad idea for you to carry something like a whistle...and a blanket and some chocolate...flare gun.
What if Bill was out of town?

 
At 9:35 PM, Blogger Julie Zickefoose said...

Dear Trixie,

Heavens no, there are no bear traps. No bears. I was just thinking about a Lassie episode when the mom got caught in a bear trap. But there are goobers who set fox and coyote traps, and those would probably be enough to hold me for awhile.
I left a comment on your blog about your mystery frost--was I right?

 
At 9:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Turd Tail!!! That is the best! Now I can go to sleep with a smile on my face.
Christine
TK PK, MD

 
At 10:00 PM, Blogger Julie Zickefoose said...

Must needs credit that moniker to my sweetie, who says Chet is one of a rare breed called the Tennessee Turd-tail. This must be said with the Chet Baker drawl.

 
At 10:05 PM, Blogger BT3 said...

Baker is the Wonder Dog of Whipple.
Tracks like a beagle without the smell or annoying voice.
Now, if only there were a canine version of Beano...

 
At 10:22 PM, Blogger Trixie said...

Julie,

Your mystery frost guess is a winner! He was the biggest blackie. We could tell when our headlamps bounced off his red eyes. They were so wide apart. Sheesh!

Glad you have none of them around. They scare easily, but cause a mother to worry.

 
At 11:58 PM, Blogger catbird said...

I really like Chet in his mock turtle/manskirt. Some guys are so fashion-forward, yet sporty, it's scary.

 
At 7:50 AM, Blogger Mary said...

This post has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 7:51 AM, Blogger Mary said...

Yes, BTs need sweaters to cover their practically bare bellies. We bought a brown leather-look bomber jacket for Chloe that she refuses to wear :) Chet looks very handsome! Thanks for the CNET link.

 
At 10:53 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jack Sparrow, schnauzer variety, absolutely hates his LLBean doggie squall jacket. If you put it on him, he'll reach back and grab a corner and try to pull it off. This results in a whirling dervish imitation that makes him so dizzy he falls down. It is worth putting it on him just for the laugh. He's rather freeze than suffer the indignity of a jacket.
Caroline in SD

 
At 11:29 AM, Blogger Maureen said...

We had a neighbor who used to thin the squirrel herd every year (and he ate them as well). Sadly, he moved and we're overrun with them, though they don't find our yard as friendly as it used to be since the arrival of Mr. Sparrow and Mr. Goodfellow.

Robin is more fierce with them. Jack is actually squirrel-sized so he's just curious. I did have one glare in through my window yesterday in full-blown disapproval mode at my array of pepper items and safflower for the birds. He'd wasted all that time climbing up the pole for naught.

Re: the Beano comment... Robin Goodfellow would like to challenge Chet Baker in a "who can clear a room the quickest" contest. I'm not sure we'd find anyone willing to judge though.

 
At 12:44 PM, Anonymous mon@rch said...

Chet might not be Lassie but for sure almost as famous!! I love hearing about his adventures with the many animals you encounter. Glad you’re keeping him warm with those sweaters.

 
At 1:16 PM, Blogger robin andrea said...

Chet looks rather sporty in his sweater, and like he'd have a spot of tea after the hunt.

 
At 3:28 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love your blog, but a coyote or fox trap poses no danger to you. Your dog, perhaps, but only if he is out roaming alone.

 
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